Comments on: Kindly reprinted with Becky’s permission. http://www.livedtotell.com/2006/09/21/kindly-reprinted-with-beckys-permission/ 35 year old mother of two trying to live with panic disorder and depression without losing her sense of humor. Tue, 06 Jan 2009 08:12:58 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.2 By: Michelle W. http://www.livedtotell.com/2006/09/21/kindly-reprinted-with-beckys-permission/#comment-6285 Michelle W. Tue, 22 Jan 2008 08:01:04 +0000 http://www.livedtotell.com/2006/09/21/kindly-reprinted-with-beckys-permission/#comment-6285 Tammy--Wow! I can agree with a lot of what she has said here...BUT...a BIG BUT......is the eating. I found that taking certain medications--effexor mainly--made my normally petite self balloon out of control. And I mean..WAY out of control. For someone like me, who is in the Army--which I have already mentioned--weight is a major factor here. Not only for my self esteem which is already in peril, but just for the sheer fact that my job requires me to fit into some weight scheme that is conducive to the nature of my job. I remember going to the doctor after weening myself off of effexor (nearly had to go to the hospital over that little "life decision" I made) and telling him that the 45 pounds I had gained in the attempt to get my mind better was NOT WORKING! I was crying more than I ever had...EVER...and this pill was supposed to save my life. Now I found that I was overweight and still miserable. HELLO? EATING is only a substitute for other addictive behavior and is not the answer but in fact could lead more to feelings of worthlessness when you go to get dressed and the size 6 you used to wear is replaced with a size 14--TRUE STORY--and to top it off you are NO BETTER OFF EMOTIONALLY. Where's the trade off there? If I were as happy as a lark...and a size 14...I would have been like...YAY!...but I wasn't. Now I was faced with potential PUNISHMENT and fear of being booted from the one thing that makes me sane...which was/is my job. I don't know...it was horrible for me. What I do know is that I stopped being worried about other unnecessary shit and started focusing on how to get myself back to "me" as I physically knew to me to be and maybe this was therapy in and of itself. I NEVER forget to eat--my husband is Italian and family revolves around the dinner table. If anything it is worse. THat is just me...but being afraid to go out in public because of my insecurities of my insane amount of weight gain is counter to my emotional recovery. Tammy, again...thank you. Tammy–Wow! I can agree with a lot of what she has said here…BUT…a BIG BUT……is the eating. I found that taking certain medications–effexor mainly–made my normally petite self balloon out of control. And I mean..WAY out of control. For someone like me, who is in the Army–which I have already mentioned–weight is a major factor here. Not only for my self esteem which is already in peril, but just for the sheer fact that my job requires me to fit into some weight scheme that is conducive to the nature of my job. I remember going to the doctor after weening myself off of effexor (nearly had to go to the hospital over that little “life decision” I made) and telling him that the 45 pounds I had gained in the attempt to get my mind better was NOT WORKING! I was crying more than I ever had…EVER…and this pill was supposed to save my life. Now I found that I was overweight and still miserable. HELLO? EATING is only a substitute for other addictive behavior and is not the answer but in fact could lead more to feelings of worthlessness when you go to get dressed and the size 6 you used to wear is replaced with a size 14–TRUE STORY–and to top it off you are NO BETTER OFF EMOTIONALLY. Where’s the trade off there? If I were as happy as a lark…and a size 14…I would have been like…YAY!…but I wasn’t. Now I was faced with potential PUNISHMENT and fear of being booted from the one thing that makes me sane…which was/is my job. I don’t know…it was horrible for me. What I do know is that I stopped being worried about other unnecessary shit and started focusing on how to get myself back to “me” as I physically knew to me to be and maybe this was therapy in and of itself. I NEVER forget to eat–my husband is Italian and family revolves around the dinner table. If anything it is worse. THat is just me…but being afraid to go out in public because of my insecurities of my insane amount of weight gain is counter to my emotional recovery.

Tammy, again…thank you.

]]> By: admin http://www.livedtotell.com/2006/09/21/kindly-reprinted-with-beckys-permission/#comment-143 admin Sat, 23 Sep 2006 00:22:09 +0000 http://www.livedtotell.com/2006/09/21/kindly-reprinted-with-beckys-permission/#comment-143 I agree. I would not be alive today if it weren't for medication, pure and simple. I try not to let this disease take over my life but I've tried denying I have it and that certainly doesn't work. I know that sometimes I forget to eat and then I get the feeling that I am having a panic attack when it's probably just low blood sugar. Scheduling regular healthy meals helps me because I often forget to eat breakfast and lunch and then I freak out around 3 and think, "Oh yeah. Duh. I forgot to eat." I agree. I would not be alive today if it weren’t for medication, pure and simple.
I try not to let this disease take over my life but I’ve tried denying I have it and that certainly doesn’t work.
I know that sometimes I forget to eat and then I get the feeling that I am having a panic attack when it’s probably just low blood sugar. Scheduling regular healthy meals helps me because I often forget to eat breakfast and lunch and then I freak out around 3 and think, “Oh yeah. Duh. I forgot to eat.”

]]> By: Plain Jane http://www.livedtotell.com/2006/09/21/kindly-reprinted-with-beckys-permission/#comment-140 Plain Jane Fri, 22 Sep 2006 16:56:03 +0000 http://www.livedtotell.com/2006/09/21/kindly-reprinted-with-beckys-permission/#comment-140 I agree wholeheartedly with a lot of the advice Becky gives, even some of the potentially hippy-dippy ones like buying flowers and sitting in the sun, and especially the one about breathing, but PLEASE do not buy into the notion that suffering from a legitimate disease is a result of letting it "control" you. That's pure bullshit. It has been proven that anxiety is primarily a physical disorder and has a genetic component. It's not a character flaw. And nowhere do I see the suggestion of medication. Lives are saved every day by the judicious prescribing of antidepressants and their importance as a treatment option should not be dismissed in favor of finding Christ. You can do both, you know. And finally, the "EAT!" suggestion? As a sufferer of depression and anxiety, I can tell you that the body knows when it doesn't want to eat, and shoving food in there against the body's wishes is a nice formula for adding food issues to the mix, which sure as hell won't help matters. Do the breathing thing, though. It really does help! I agree wholeheartedly with a lot of the advice Becky gives, even some of the potentially hippy-dippy ones like buying flowers and sitting in the sun, and especially the one about breathing, but PLEASE do not buy into the notion that suffering from a legitimate disease is a result of letting it “control” you. That’s pure bullshit. It has been proven that anxiety is primarily a physical disorder and has a genetic component. It’s not a character flaw. And nowhere do I see the suggestion of medication. Lives are saved every day by the judicious prescribing of antidepressants and their importance as a treatment option should not be dismissed in favor of finding Christ. You can do both, you know. And finally, the “EAT!” suggestion? As a sufferer of depression and anxiety, I can tell you that the body knows when it doesn’t want to eat, and shoving food in there against the body’s wishes is a nice formula for adding food issues to the mix, which sure as hell won’t help matters. Do the breathing thing, though. It really does help!

]]>