Comments on: Conflicted. http://www.livedtotell.com/2008/06/02/conflicted/ 35 year old mother of two trying to live with panic disorder and depression without losing her sense of humor. Fri, 21 Nov 2008 15:52:07 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.2 By: Bonnie http://www.livedtotell.com/2008/06/02/conflicted/#comment-6602 Bonnie Thu, 05 Jun 2008 15:30:58 +0000 http://www.livedtotell.com/2008/06/02/conflicted/#comment-6602 A while back I was going through a really hard time financially and didn't even have money for food for several days. I came to work one of those days when I hadn't eaten anything that day or the day before and as I walked by his desk, a co-worker I have known and liked forever offered me half of his sub and I just smiled and said "No thanks" even though I was starving. Makes no sense, but I hear ya. <3 A while back I was going through a really hard time financially and didn’t even have money for food for several days.

I came to work one of those days when I hadn’t eaten anything that day or the day before and as I walked by his desk, a co-worker I have known and liked forever offered me half of his sub and I just smiled and said “No thanks” even though I was starving.

Makes no sense, but I hear ya.

<3

]]> By: Ashleas http://www.livedtotell.com/2008/06/02/conflicted/#comment-6600 Ashleas Wed, 04 Jun 2008 18:58:25 +0000 http://www.livedtotell.com/2008/06/02/conflicted/#comment-6600 That's how I feel too. Since I broke up with my second boyfriend, all my friends from High School essentially abandoned me. I never hear from them and I don't care to reach out to them after how they treated me. My two best friends are at different colleges and we rarely talk anymore.. I never hear from them really when we're all home now. Just drifted apart I guess. Out of my college friends.. One ended up a poisonous train wreck, One lived off campus and has his own life.. one graduated and my best friend, my roommate, is currently at home, but she graduates in December. Nobody tries to reach me.. and I'm content. I too feel the desire to be apart of a group, to have people to eat lunch with on a regular basis. My Dad's dying and I have this great desire to shout it out to everyone, to break down in tears in front of the entire student union, to just run away.. but I don't want the attention. I do, and I don't and I'm damned if I do, Damned if I don't. I don't want to go home and deal with him or my mother or my grandparents. I want to shut myself up in my room, only emerging to work at a place where I can develop a team.. but no real friends. I know the feeling and I too, want to hide in plain view. Go ahead and try to reach me.. show you care enough to try more than once and maybe I'll give you a smile too. Man this is an emo post about myself.. I just wanted to share my feelings and that I too feel the same. That’s how I feel too. Since I broke up with my second boyfriend, all my friends from High School essentially abandoned me. I never hear from them and I don’t care to reach out to them after how they treated me. My two best friends are at different colleges and we rarely talk anymore.. I never hear from them really when we’re all home now. Just drifted apart I guess. Out of my college friends.. One ended up a poisonous train wreck, One lived off campus and has his own life.. one graduated and my best friend, my roommate, is currently at home, but she graduates in December. Nobody tries to reach me.. and I’m content. I too feel the desire to be apart of a group, to have people to eat lunch with on a regular basis.

My Dad’s dying and I have this great desire to shout it out to everyone, to break down in tears in front of the entire student union, to just run away.. but I don’t want the attention. I do, and I don’t and I’m damned if I do, Damned if I don’t. I don’t want to go home and deal with him or my mother or my grandparents. I want to shut myself up in my room, only emerging to work at a place where I can develop a team.. but no real friends.

I know the feeling and I too, want to hide in plain view. Go ahead and try to reach me.. show you care enough to try more than once and maybe I’ll give you a smile too.

Man this is an emo post about myself.. I just wanted to share my feelings and that I too feel the same.

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